ladies! wondering how to best make your breasts work for you ... at the office, in the club, and beyond? well, here's some news you can really use!
this article, an interview with elisabeth squires, author of boobs: a guide to your girls, is the perfect storm of outrage and hilarity. so many ridiculous statements, it could (and should) be an onion article. including:
* "We have to remember that while more women are showing more cleavage, you really have to use your breast power responsibly..."
* "You don't have to be flat-chested to be taken seriously [at work]..."
* "Your children should not have to compete with your cleavage for attention."
* Night is prime time to bring out breasts, but Squires suggested women treat their cleavage as part of their outfit -- not a focal point.
that last one -- OMG
OTOH, it's not funny. it's actually kind of horrifying that this is "news." i mean, "breast power"? big breasts are booming? but small breasts are fine, really they are, although small-chested pregnant women should show off their cleavage b/c it's their only chance to strut their stuff? a study shows that men feel "medium-breasted" (no actual size given) women looked most "professional and personable" in the workplace, so the article advises smaller women to wear padding and larger ones to bind their breasts? (oh, wait ... that is funny.)
in short, ladies: love yourself as you are, but remember you're always being judged by your appearance, and never forget that male approval is the key measurement of success. thanks for the tips, ABC news!