drink me

someone at work sold a new account, this malt liquor/energy drink. so there were samples, and so we tried it. it was pretty gruesome -- it tasted like a flat peach wine cooler (soooo '80s) -- but i drank the whole can. experiment. it made me almost instantly speedy (note: chemical compounds tend to hit me hard and fast), but also just ever so slightly disoriented, as alcohol will do. after a while i went off to the drugstore and to run errands. while shopping i felt a little confused at points, like i would if i'd had a quick beer, then run into a brightly lit place like that. but i also felt a bit jumpy, like my skin kept rearranging itself at its own whim. while checking out, the cashier was having problems dealing with the coupons i gave her, and usually i'm pretty mellow about that stuff. people who work in drugstores have it tough enough w/o me being a bitch b/c of some computer/human malfunction. but tonight i was totally irritated by it, feeling a weird combination of alcohol-induced-esque aggression and speed-induced-esque impatience.

anyway, i didn't make a scene or anything, just paid and took my stuff and said thanks and left. but as i walked out i began pondering the notion that these effects would doubtless be intensified if one were to consume more of this beverage. and this is being marketed to the youth of america?? (fortunately, the stuff tastes so dreadful i can't imagine it taking off. i mean, red bull is nasty enough ... this stuff is way worse.)